Sunday, November 13, 2011

No Trophies!

A businessman relies on his mother to push him up the corporate ladder. She enlists a team of her senior citizen patients to use their network to help him.

or a book of biz advice by a bunch of moms.

Upgrade

advanced iphone users compete for power by upgrading to new operating system versions and building their own apps

Steve Jobs works on a new pill that when you take it connects you to your iPhone via your brain.  He thinks it has all sorts of amazing capabilities but only when used for good.  When Jobs dies and the world mourns, a undercover operative inside Apple, with the help of Eric Schmidt, takes over the project and tests it on some real people with action-packed, terrifying results.

ToxicPlanetLOL

Young liberal Internet billionaire looking for love starts the ToxicPlanetLOL website.  He's tired of all those liberal chicks coming on to him and he goes online as a TeaParty conservative and falls in love with one from a RedState.  Hilarity ensues as he pretends to be conservative to "meet the family".  The whole state is expecting him and they all show their true colors when they meet him.

He uses crowdsourcing & the Internet to help him get the girl.

Tagline: WTF LOL?

Friday, September 23, 2011

Columbo's Coat

A young entrepreneur stoner - he runs the most popular vaporizer review site on the Web and is trying to invent "iPhone of Vaporizers" - gets on jury duty for a personal injury case.  He goes for foreman and runs the deliberations in which they quickly find for the defense.  After the verdict is rendered he discovers that the Defendant was really guilty.  He decides to  solve the case on his own by acting like Columbo.  The title refers to what his prop was going to be to help fool people into thinking he was simple, like Columbo's Coat.

Soundtrack: Pulled Pork by BJ's Greasy Spoon

Saturday, March 12, 2011

Trouble in Farmville

 A group of toys live across the street from the Toy Story toys' house.  They are owned by a teenage boy who is still a virgin.  The boy discovers that his toys are alive and convinces them to help him get laid.  He even threatens to give his Wii Asian Man with Afro Avatar to his kid sister if he doesn't go along.  One of his toys is a Farmville family that traverses the Internet to help, including hacking the Pentagon and getting to know a flash stripper ad.  A GI Joe doll with post-war-stress-syndrome is in love with the boy's sister's Bratz doll who has the hots for Woody.  All day long it's "Woody" this and "Woody" that.

Scene: GI Joe finally gets it up.  He calls to the Bratz doll "Check it out babe.  I've got a..."  The Bratz doll beams and sez "Woody".

Scene: GI Joe recounts the epic battle in the sand box against dinosaurs, super heroes and a Barbie that has razor blades for breasts.  At one point in the story he turns his back to the other toys, drops his pants to show a horribly scorched butt.  "Jimmy Groglio shoved a lit firecracker up my ass".  "The horror.  The horror."

Saturday, March 5, 2011

Dead Air

The world is quickly running out of oil and we are on the brink of global war.  All of the countries with space programs race to launch a space crew to take control of the last space satellite.  Back on earth a scientist has come up with a controversial method to create energy from outer space by using a satellite.  As the space battle begins, he discovers the missing formula he needs to make the invention work.  He gets in touch with a Richard Branson like figure who has a commercial space ship and convinces him to send him up with some mercenaries to try to stop the war and end the energy crisis.

Encrypted

A brilliant hacker is asked by the government to write a code that will cripple Iran's nuclear centrifuge.  In doing so he gets access to the information of everyone on the planet.  He releases a cyber worm onto the Web.  He becomes drunk with power as the effects of his work ripple throughout the world, and driven mad by the consequences.

With Justin Timberlake as Solo